Thursday, December 14, 2006

Jeff Foxworthy's comments on North Dakota

Jeff Foxworthy's comments on North Dakota

If "vacation" to you means going shopping for the
weekend in Grand Forks, Fargo, Minot or Bismarck (while the kids swim at the Comfort Inn),
You might live in North Dakota.

If parking your car for the night involves an extension cord You might live in North Dakota

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 8 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you're proud that your state makes the national news primarily because it houses the coldest spot in the nation,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy",
You might live in North Dakota

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March,
You might live in North Dakota.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there,
You might live in North Dakota.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, You might live in North Dakota.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
You might live in North Dakota.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you know how to correctly pronounce Medina, Cando, and Hebron,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you measure distance in hours,
You might live in North Dakota.

If your family vehicle is a crew cab pickup,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you know several people who have hit deer more than once,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you often switch from "heat" to "A/C"in the same day and back
again, You might live in North Dakota.

If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you see people wearing hunting clothes at social events,
You might live in North Dakota.

If you've installed security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, You might live in North Dakota.

If the largest traffic jam in your town centers around a high school basketball game, You might live in North Dakota.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them, You might live in North Dakota.

If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Wal-Mart any given time, You might live in North Dakota.

If there are more people at work on Christmas Eve Day than on Deer gun Opener, You might live in North Dakota.

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,
You might live in North Dakota.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, You might live in North Dakota.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, You might live in North Dakota.

If you can identify a southern or eastern accent, You might live in North Dakota.

If you consider Fargo exotic, You might live in North Dakota.

If your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your cottonwood, You might live in North Dakota.

If the sunbelt to you means Bismarck, You might live in North Dakota.

If a brat is something you eat, You might live in North Dakota.

If finding your misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition, You might live in North Dakota.

If you go out to a fish fry every Friday, You might live in North Dakota.

If you find 0 degrees a little chilly, You might live in North Dakota.
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